Crafting a Meaningful Wedding: Going Beyond Practicalities and To-Do Lists
It's an exciting and at times overwhelming journey, planning your wedding.
As a wedding photographer, I've had the privilege of witnessing numerous weddings, and it has become clear to me that there is a deeper aspect to it than simply organizing a beautiful event or or ticking off boxes on a checklist. The real craft lies in creating a celebration that is deeply meaningful to you as a couple.
The internet is filled with ideas on what a "dream wedding" should look like, providing practical guides from A to Z. However, I believe there are some important aspects that these resources often overlook. Digging deeper than the practical, there are essential questions to ask, values to consider, and a mindset to adopt before diving into the planning process. Inspired by this, I've identified a few important steps which I believe could help you uncover what truly matters most to you, and can guide you into crafting a wedding celebration filled with so much meaning and joy.
Define the Purpose of Your Wedding
I get it, it's tempting to open up Pinterest and start gathering all sorts of inspiration for your dream wedding. But hold up for just a second. Before delving into the intricate details, take a moment to clarify the purpose behind your wedding celebration. Why are you choosing to get married and what do you want your wedding day to represent?
By uncovering the true meaning and purpose, you'll have a solid foundation to guide your entire planning process. This will help you prioritize what truly matters, and ensure that every aspect of your wedding reflects its significance.
*Fun Activity Idea: Get a piece of paper for both you and your partner. Take a moment to individually write down your thoughts on the purpose of your wedding. Try to define in as much detail as possible what a successful wedding day would be like for you. Then, take turns sharing your ideas with each other, creating an open conversation.
Establish Your Values and Shared Vision
Rather than focusing on what others are doing or what is expected, it's important to establish your own values and shared vision as a couple.
Reflect on your journey as a couple and the values that are important to you. What makes your relationship special? Is it your shared sense of humor, your dedication to supporting one another's dreams, or your shared passions? Or maybe your love for adventure and commitment to fostering a strong sense of community? Envision the kind of marriage you aspire to create, and let these values guide your wedding planning.
As a practical example, if building community is important to you, consider incorporating elements that foster connection. You could arrange pre-wedding events, such as a welcome dinner or group activities to bring your families and friends together and give them an opportunity to get to know each other better. Or you could include an interactive game that encourage guests to connect during the reception
By integrating practical ways to build community, your wedding becomes more than just a beautiful celebration —it becomes a platform for nurturing meaningful connections among your loved ones and creating a supportive community that will continue to thrive long after the wedding day.
Seek Unity in Decision-Making
Keep in mind that planning your wedding is not just about creating an unforgettable celebration; it's also an opportunity to strengthen your relationship. Remember that your wedding day is just one milestone in the grand journey of your lives together. So, when making decisions, prioritize respect and unity, considering how each choice can contribute to the growth and strength of your bond in the future. Treat wedding planning as a collaborative adventure, where the focus is on making decisions together. Communicate openly, listen actively to each other's perspectives, and strive to find common ground.
Another important element to decision-making while planning your wedding is managing family relationships. Remember that your families may have their own expectations and opinions about the wedding. It's essential to handle these situations with care and inclusivity. Involve both sets of families in the planning process, welcoming their input and considering their preferences. Create an environment where everyone feels comfortable expressing themselves, ensuring that their voices are heard and respected. However, always remember that the final decisions should reflect your vision as a couple. Aim for a balance between honoring your family and staying true to your own desires. By approaching family relationships with understanding and keeping communication channels open, you can foster a sense of unity and togetherness throughout the wedding planning journey. This will not only strengthen your bond as a couple but also create a shared sense of joy and celebration for your families.
Identify Mentors
Finding mentors who can offer guidance and support throughout your wedding planning process can be incredibly helpful. They can provide a listening ear when you need someone to talk to, share their wisdom, help you make decisions, and strengthen your relationship as you prepare for married life.
Seek out wise and experienced couples in your life who you admire and trust, or turn to close family friends and relatives who have successfully navigated married life. Mentors can help you gain perspective on the bigger picture and remind you of the importance of focusing on your relationship amidst the wedding planning. They can offer insights into what truly matters in a marriage and guide you in making decisions that align with your long-term goals and values as a couple.
Invite your guests into your unique love story
I must admit, this particular point is based on my personal preference ;) However, it's been my observation time and time again that incorporating this element has the potential to truly elevate the wedding day, just adding that "wow-factor." Plus, it infuses the planning process with so much more freedom and joy.
Craft a wedding celebration that truly reflects your unique love story. Think beyond the traditional aspects of a wedding, and aim to infuse every detail with warmth, joy, and personal meaning.
Be intentional about every decision - from your guest list and the manner in which you invite your guests, to your choice of venue, decor, food, music and activities. Share your love story with your guests, inviting them into your journey rather than simply creating a beautiful event.
Extend Grace and Cherish the Journey
Just like life itself, your wedding-planning journey will be an adventure filled with both ups and downs. From the exhilarating moments of excitement to the challenges that come with a new chapter, it's completely normal to experience a whirlwind of emotions. In the midst of it all, it's SO important to extend grace and kindness to yourself, your partner and everyone involved.
Embrace the uncertainty that may arise and and try to approach challenges with empathy and understanding, cultivating an environment of love, support and joy as you navigate through the planning process. Let your core values serve as a compass, guiding your decisions along the way. And when you find yourself needing guidance, lean on your mentors for support and advice.
But above all, remember that relationships matter more than striving for perfection. Treasure the connections and love that have brought you here, and let them be the driving force behind your wedding planning journey.
Your wedding day is not just a culmination of months of planning; it's the start of a new chapter in your lives together. My hope is that this article will help you move beyond practicalities, to-do lists, traditions, and even your own expectations - to create a wedding celebration that’s truly meaningful to you.
Cherish the journey and embrace all of the moments that will make your wedding day - and your lifelong journey together as a couple, the most wonderful adventure.